Dean Winchester (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
hasperkynipples) wrote2010-01-05 11:47 pm
hasperkynipples) wrote2010-01-05 11:47 pm
[MM] Martha Washington quote
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wayward_au. Alec is ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
smart_alec494 who made a request for Dean and Alec future fic with the prompt “silly.” Olivia is an NPC.]
“I've learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.”
“Dude, you suck with kids.”
Olivia was in tears again, and somehow it was his fault. Michael wasn’t sure how, as he had done everything as he was told. He was holding her just the way he was supposed to and—nothing. Not even an acknowledgement from the little girl, who seemed content to only wail until Alec came in and took her off Michael’s hands. Olivia clung to him like her life depended on it, sliding her arms around her cousin’s neck as she slowly calmed herself against his shoulder.
“I wasn’t created to deal with children.” It could almost be said that the angel was sulking, if angels did such a thing. “I was meant to be a warrior, the wrath of the Almighty. I’m not a babysitter.” Alec was quiet for a moment. He recognized the look in his son’s eyes, the one that came with doubt as to Michael’s feelings towards his son. His face softened a bit. “And taking care of you is not babysitting, Alec.”
“I know.” He said the words, but Michael could feel the uncertainty rolling off his in waves. It unsettled the Dean end of the spectrum more than Michael—Dean didn’t like that Alec doubted Dean’s reasons for being there, though he knew that as of late, he hadn’t done much to prove to him that he wasn’t going anywhere. He was trying to fix it, but there was only so much he could do with who he was now. The pieces of Dean and Michael were still separate entities, as much as he tried to bring them together, and it wasn’t getting easier as he had hoped.
Once Olivia settled down again, Alec placed her back in her crib and went downstairs to finish what he was doing earlier. As he headed out the door, Olivia’s face started to contort into what Ruby commonly referred to as “That Face,” and Michael was starting to panic, unsure of how to stop her from screaming for someone other than Michael again.
Dude, you really do suck with kids.
Michael grit his teeth against the voice in the back of his mind, and took a moment to remind him that he wasn’t doing much to help either. Then there was a shift as Dean pushed his way forward, settling back into his shoulders a bit before moving closer. It was almost as though Olivia could sense that there was a change, that this was more her uncle than the ancient archangel that was currently in charge.
“Hey, there, sweetheart,” he said softly. Olivia blinked at him, and then her arms came up again in the universal ‘pick me up’ gesture.
Dean could feel the skeptical scoff in the back of his mind from the angel, but he didn’t care for the moment. This was the first opportunity that he’d really had to hold his niece with her actually wanting to be there, and he was going to take advantage of it. She curled into him, resting her head against his shoulder and looking up at him with big puppy eyes, and he couldn’t help the small laugh that came with it.
“Yeah, you’re gonna be givin’ your dad a run for his money.”
Moving over to one of the rocking chairs, he settled back into the seat and let her sit on his lap for a bit. “Now, I know it sounds kinda silly, and I know you don’t like Michael very much, but—we’re still kinda workin’ that whole thing out. And I know it hurts when people don’t get to see me. I mean, I’m not blind, or stupid. I get it. But—Michael’s easier. At least for now.”
Her eyes started to close as he rocked back and forth in the seat, the heels of his boots pushing against the hardwood floor gently. “And I know what you’re thinking—you’re thinking ‘Don’t be ridiculous, Uncle Dean. This is your family. They’ll love you whether or not you’re some tight assed son of a bitch who’s been around since the world friggin’ began,’ but it’s not that easy, you know?”
His fingers shifted a bit so that it was rubbing her arm lightly, callused fingers brushing against soft skin and watching as her little fingers curled around his larger one. “It’s just—there’s so much up there, you know? Things he’s seen, things he’s done. Michael—he’s seen so much. He’s watched so much just happen. I can’t—I can’t deal with that. I wasn’t ready for that.”
He could feel Alec at the door, watching him with Olivia, and he knew that this was a betrayal on some level. That the only person Dean felt comfortable coming out for when things weren’t going to shit was the one year-old girl who was slowly falling asleep on his lap. Dean knew that that was because Olivia had no expectations. She didn’t want or need Dean to be a certain way, she just needed him to be. The rest of his family didn’t have that leisure. He pushed that thought to the back of his mind, however, and just continued to focus on the person in front of him.
“I guess—just having Michael dealing with me was just easier than having me dealing with Michael. And I know it’s not fair, but—it’s what I had to do.”
“You could trust us, you know?” he said softly, arms wrapped around his middle as he leaned in the doorway, almost as though he was hugging himself. “That we’d be able to handle it.”
“You guys handling it isn’t the problem,” Dean replied softly, scooping the now sleeping Olivia up again, and placing her back down in the crib, tucking her in gently.
“Really? Because that’s what it sounds like.”
“No,” he said softly. “The one who couldn’t handle it was me.”
980 words
wayward_au. Alec is smart_alec494 who made a request for Dean and Alec future fic with the prompt “silly.” Olivia is an NPC.]“I've learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.”
“Dude, you suck with kids.”
Olivia was in tears again, and somehow it was his fault. Michael wasn’t sure how, as he had done everything as he was told. He was holding her just the way he was supposed to and—nothing. Not even an acknowledgement from the little girl, who seemed content to only wail until Alec came in and took her off Michael’s hands. Olivia clung to him like her life depended on it, sliding her arms around her cousin’s neck as she slowly calmed herself against his shoulder.
“I wasn’t created to deal with children.” It could almost be said that the angel was sulking, if angels did such a thing. “I was meant to be a warrior, the wrath of the Almighty. I’m not a babysitter.” Alec was quiet for a moment. He recognized the look in his son’s eyes, the one that came with doubt as to Michael’s feelings towards his son. His face softened a bit. “And taking care of you is not babysitting, Alec.”
“I know.” He said the words, but Michael could feel the uncertainty rolling off his in waves. It unsettled the Dean end of the spectrum more than Michael—Dean didn’t like that Alec doubted Dean’s reasons for being there, though he knew that as of late, he hadn’t done much to prove to him that he wasn’t going anywhere. He was trying to fix it, but there was only so much he could do with who he was now. The pieces of Dean and Michael were still separate entities, as much as he tried to bring them together, and it wasn’t getting easier as he had hoped.
Once Olivia settled down again, Alec placed her back in her crib and went downstairs to finish what he was doing earlier. As he headed out the door, Olivia’s face started to contort into what Ruby commonly referred to as “That Face,” and Michael was starting to panic, unsure of how to stop her from screaming for someone other than Michael again.
Dude, you really do suck with kids.
Michael grit his teeth against the voice in the back of his mind, and took a moment to remind him that he wasn’t doing much to help either. Then there was a shift as Dean pushed his way forward, settling back into his shoulders a bit before moving closer. It was almost as though Olivia could sense that there was a change, that this was more her uncle than the ancient archangel that was currently in charge.
“Hey, there, sweetheart,” he said softly. Olivia blinked at him, and then her arms came up again in the universal ‘pick me up’ gesture.
Dean could feel the skeptical scoff in the back of his mind from the angel, but he didn’t care for the moment. This was the first opportunity that he’d really had to hold his niece with her actually wanting to be there, and he was going to take advantage of it. She curled into him, resting her head against his shoulder and looking up at him with big puppy eyes, and he couldn’t help the small laugh that came with it.
“Yeah, you’re gonna be givin’ your dad a run for his money.”
Moving over to one of the rocking chairs, he settled back into the seat and let her sit on his lap for a bit. “Now, I know it sounds kinda silly, and I know you don’t like Michael very much, but—we’re still kinda workin’ that whole thing out. And I know it hurts when people don’t get to see me. I mean, I’m not blind, or stupid. I get it. But—Michael’s easier. At least for now.”
Her eyes started to close as he rocked back and forth in the seat, the heels of his boots pushing against the hardwood floor gently. “And I know what you’re thinking—you’re thinking ‘Don’t be ridiculous, Uncle Dean. This is your family. They’ll love you whether or not you’re some tight assed son of a bitch who’s been around since the world friggin’ began,’ but it’s not that easy, you know?”
His fingers shifted a bit so that it was rubbing her arm lightly, callused fingers brushing against soft skin and watching as her little fingers curled around his larger one. “It’s just—there’s so much up there, you know? Things he’s seen, things he’s done. Michael—he’s seen so much. He’s watched so much just happen. I can’t—I can’t deal with that. I wasn’t ready for that.”
He could feel Alec at the door, watching him with Olivia, and he knew that this was a betrayal on some level. That the only person Dean felt comfortable coming out for when things weren’t going to shit was the one year-old girl who was slowly falling asleep on his lap. Dean knew that that was because Olivia had no expectations. She didn’t want or need Dean to be a certain way, she just needed him to be. The rest of his family didn’t have that leisure. He pushed that thought to the back of his mind, however, and just continued to focus on the person in front of him.
“I guess—just having Michael dealing with me was just easier than having me dealing with Michael. And I know it’s not fair, but—it’s what I had to do.”
“You could trust us, you know?” he said softly, arms wrapped around his middle as he leaned in the doorway, almost as though he was hugging himself. “That we’d be able to handle it.”
“You guys handling it isn’t the problem,” Dean replied softly, scooping the now sleeping Olivia up again, and placing her back down in the crib, tucking her in gently.
“Really? Because that’s what it sounds like.”
“No,” he said softly. “The one who couldn’t handle it was me.”
980 words